What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us — Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)Deep down, most of us know that character matters. But when we begin to talk about how to build character, we are vague, often preachy and usually ineffective. How does one explain this phenomenon?
Many shy away from the subject, choosing to hunker down in their own comfortable ‘little world. Thats fine except for one problem. If we all did that, when do we do our serious self-reflection and soul searching — thinking about values and choices? How do we prepare ourselves for times when things arent going well whether in the world, our countries or our own backyards? And most importantly, how do we provide the support and leadership children need and expect from us?
There are multiple definitions of ‘character and ways of evaluating character. Character can be described as:
• The inward motivation to do the right thing
• Moral or ethical strength
• The software that drives your output or behaviour
People have long deba-ted how good character is developed. Some think its shaped by preaching and advising children regar-ding what is right and wrong. Others believe that kids develop character by learning to think or reason about right and wrong. Finally, there are those who argue that character is built by habitually practicing whats right.
On the other hand, I believe that through life experiences — adversity, success, failure, trial and error — a young person can grow and develop the skills or traits that strengthens her character.
Moreover, character develops over time and in stages. For example, we crawl before we learn to walk. We learn arithmetic before algebra. In the early stages of life, children accept that whats right is the rule of authority. In the second stage of life, children tend to become less accepting; they begin to understand there are different sides to every issue. In stages three and four, young people aspire to become members of conventional society and accept its values, norms, and expectations. And in stages five and six, people become less concerned with maintaining society for its own sake, and more concerned with the principles and values that constitute a good society.
I believe two basic considerations influence character development.
• Core values. Essentially, character development requires developing your values — determining and living according to whats important to you. For example, I consider honesty, integrity, responsibility, humility, maturity and consideration for others as essential traits of positive character.
• Connecting head, heart, and behaviour. As an individual and coach who has propounded strong views about how people should grow and develop, I become uncomfortable when people advocate memorising words and slogans as a basic strategy for building character. We all need to learn to think, reason and reflect when evaluating competing values, as well as develop the skills necessary to discharge our deepest convictions despite peer or other pressures.
The statement sport develops character has been propagated since the time of ancient Greeks and the first Olympic games. But this easy aphorism is contradicted by regular media reports of grave misconduct in almost every game, sports or athletics event. Although numerous studies have been conducted to answer the question: Does sport build character? no consensus has emerged, but they have served the useful purpose of generating widespread debate.
I believe the fair answer to this oft-debated subject is: it depends on the coach. Coaches are among the most influential people in a young sportspersons life. They are powerful role models and what they need to teach youth is to become better human beings rather than podium finishers. To be sure, they teach techniques and strategies, but by their words and actions they also teach vital life skills and values. On the other hand, there are coaches who tend to take a narrow view of their vocation and measure success almost exclusively in terms of the wins and losses of their wards. Such coaches create the selfish, self-absorbed, and arrogant athletes of television screens and newspaper headlines.
So, while it is true to say that sports and games dont per se develop character, clearly theres a major role played by parents, coaches, games officials, teammates and community members who serve as role models and could influence youth in positive ways.
A noted speaker expounding on character development through sport, once offered his own version of the famous quote sport develops character by offering the insight that sports dont teach character, coaches do. To which I would add: So do parents, referees, teammates and fans.

(Dr. George A. Selleck is a San Francisco-based advisor to EduSports, Bangalore)