Riddhi Doshi Patel
My six-year-old son becomes very anxious before attending his swimming lessons. Despite his love for swimming, this anxiety is affecting him adversely. How can I ease his pre-lessons anxiety?
— Joni Sharma, Mumbai
Some children tend to become anxious before starting a new activity. Here are some ways you can help him manage anxiety and build his self-confidence:
Establish a routine. A consistent pre-lesson routine could include calming activities such as listening to a favourite song on the way to the pool and/or deep-breathing exercises.
Gradual exposure. If possible, visit the pool on non-lesson days to familiarise him with the environment without the pressure of a lesson. This will reduce anxiety by making the setting feel more familiar.
Discuss emotions. Encourage your son to articulate his emotions. You can say, “I noticed you seem worried before swimming. What makes you feel that way?” Praise your son for his courage and effort, regardless of performance.
— Sheeja Kumar, Chennai
Introducing new foods to toddlers is challenging, but there are ways to make the experience less stressful and more successful. Here are some suggestions:
Take small steps. Start by introducing a small portion of the new food item alongside familiar favorites. Don’t pressure her to eat it.
Make it fun. Turn trying new foods into a game. You can create a ‘food adventure’ where each new food is part of a story or pretend play. For example, ‘Today, we’re trying broccoli trees from the dinosaur forest!’ Also involve her in the food preparation process.
Copy the monkey. Eat the new item yourself and show enjoyment. Children often imitate their parents, so if she sees you happily eating it, she may be more inclined to try it.
Consistency and patience. It often takes multiple exposures to a new food before a child will accept it. Keep offering it without pressuring her. Celebrate small victories, such as her touching or smelling the food.
My ten-year-old son exhibits excessive worry and fear of exams. How can we help him manage his exam-related stress and anxiety?
— Gina Thomas, Bengaluru
First, make sure he feels comfortable talking about his fears and anxieties. Listen to him non-judgmentally and let him know it’s normal to feel nervous about exams. Encourage him to establish a regular study routine to avoid the panic of last-minute cramming, and break down lessons into small chunks. Teach him relaxation techniques such as deep breathing or mindfulness exercises to calm the mind. Encourage a positive mindset by praising his effort, not just scores, and use positive self-talk. Provide him a quiet, organized place to study at home and encourage him to take regular breaks to avoid burnout. Doing drill exams and learning time management skills will help him get used to the exam format and feel more confident. Moreover provide him a balanced diet, ensure he gets adequate sleep, and encourage him to exercise regularly.
Finally, celebrate his efforts and progress, no matter how small, to motivate him. Using these strategies, you can help him manage exam stress in a healthy and positive way.
(Riddhi Doshi Patel is a Mumbai-based child psychologist, behaviour specialist and founder of Rhyns Academy, which provides soft and life skills training programmes)