Whether it is questioning rules, insolence towards elders or “acting out” to “fit in” with peers, there are deeper reasons for your adolescent’s rebellious behaviour, says Arundhati Nath Does it anger you when your teen openly flouts rules at home/school or answers back rudely? Do you often wonder how your innocent child has transformed into an unruly and rebellious teen? Adolescence is a period of intense physical, psychological and emotional change. During the teen years, children experience angst, highs and lows and are very vulnerable to peer, parental and academic pressure. Therefore, it’s a challenge for adolescents to deal with emotions equably and think rationally. In his best-seller book What’s Happening to My Teen? Uncovering the Sources of Rebellion (2009), American author Mark Gregston wrote that contemporary teens live in a world that is vastly different from the world their parents grew up in. “Today’s teen culture is full of confusing values and misguiding principles. The media sensationalises everything and misguided focus on fame and celebrity encourages competition in presentation, possessions and experimentation.” The teenage brain A 2015 study of the University of Southern California reveals that teenage rebellion is “often triggered by a young person’s need to assert individuality, as well as a desire to separate from parents”. An earlier 2014 study conducted by Duke University, USA, highlighted that “teenage brains are different than of adults and this makes them more likely to rebel”. This study found that during adolescence, the limbic system connects and communicates with the rest of the brain differently than it does during adulthood. This makes many adolescents susceptible to risky behaviour. The reasons behind teenage rebellion are numerous. Teens are anxious to be accepted within their peer group, prompting them to be ‘cool’ and dress inappropriately, and experiment with drugs and/or alcohol. Many teens rebel because they want attention, and are trying to establish their personal identities and find life’s purpose. It’s normative for them to assert their independence and resist parental advice and control. According to US-based psychologist Carl E Pickhardt there are two common types of teen rebellion — “rebellion of non-conformity and rebellion of non-compliance”. In both types, he says, rebellion attracts adult attention by offending it. Young people rebel against their self-interest, engage in self-defeating and self-destructive activities, experiment with high-risk behaviour, and injure valued relationships especially with parents and elders. Parents aren’t always right Riddhi Doshi Patel, a Mumbai-based child and adolescent psychologist and behavioural coach, believes that latter-day teens are far more empowered than previous generations and therefore parents need to modernise their reactions to contemporary adolescent behaviour. “Teenagers often understand the pros and cons of risky behaviour but when parents constantly nag and impose their adult authority, they are turned off. Parents need to stop preaching and lecturing. Instead they should engage in meaningful conversations with their teens. Parents aren’t always right,” says Patel. Patel narrates the case of a young teen brought in for counselling by her mother who complained that she was very disobedient and rude.…
