(Rajat Soni is a Delhi-based youth and parenting coach, and author of Unjudge Your Teenager (2020).)

Rajat Soni

My seven-year-old son has been diagnosed with ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder). It is very difficult to get him to complete basic tasks such as homework. Please advise.

— Vindhya Seeman, Hyderabad

Divide your child’s tasks and set priorities. List important tasks and schedule to get them completed when your son displays highest energy levels. Create visual checklists to complete tasks and chores. This can include activities such as brushing teeth, packing the school bag, putting on socks and shoes, etc. Prepare a separate checklist for school and other post-school chores.

Encourage him to complete homework on his own while offering your support in difficult subjects. It’s also helpful if, at the end of his homework time, you check the completed work. However, don’t get caught up in checking for accuracy, just for completion. This way he will be more willing to let you check his work and support him.

My eight-year-old son is mischievous and hyperactive. How can I best canalise his boundless energy?

— Mishika Varma, Bengaluru

A focused approach to life can canalise your son’s boundless energy in positive and productive directions. Spend quality time discussing school, friendships, hobbies and interests, and encourage him to set small, achievable goals.

Start by identifying his interests and involve him in planning a daily schedule of activities that provides healthy outlets for his energy. Encourage him to follow the activities and responsibilities that he has signed up for. Keeping him purposefully engaged will not only help canalise his energy in the right direction but also enable him to develop healthier self-esteem and relationships, clearer judgement, self-motivation, time-management skills and a greater sense of self-efficacy.

My son enjoys sketching and painting and wants to pursue a career in fine art. However, several members of our extended family are critical of his choice, partly because they believe fine art is not a suitable career for men. Their criticism is affecting his self-esteem and making him feel pressured to choose another career. How can I support and reassure him?

— Dhrutika Sinha, Delhi

In many middle-class Indian households, parents tend to steer sons toward careers traditionally regarded as “strong” and “successful”, such as engineering, medicine, finance, technology. But if a male child expresses interest in teaching, nursing, social work, the arts, families are hesitant about encouraging these pathways. Well-meaning parents may ask, “That’s wonderful, but will it pay the bills?” or “What’s the long-term plan?” Such comments, even if subtle, shape male children’s beliefs about careers that are socially acceptable for men. Over time, they may internalise the message that professions centred on creativity, care, emotional expression are “less masculine”.

In today’s world, where the ‘manosphere’ and hypermasculine online spaces are increasingly influential, these stereotypes can be especially damaging. When male children feel they must suppress their emotions and abandon interests that don’t fit traditional masculine ideals, they become vulnerable to narratives that equate manhood with dominance, emotional detachment, and rigid gender roles.

The most valuable support you can offer your son is unwavering belief in his talent and aspirations. Let him know that there is dignity and success in every profession pursued with passion and commitment. Encourage his artistic interests, celebrate his achievements, and introduce him to successful male artists and designers who have built fulfilling careers. At the same time, gently challenge relatives’ outdated assumptions and reassure your son that career choice does not define masculinity. A confident, supportive home environment will strengthen his self-esteem and empower him to pursue the career he truly wants, regardless of social stereotypes.